It can be terrifying when a friend or family member expresses feelings of suicide. However, speaking about suicidal ideation can be the first step to getting help. If you are worried that someone is considering harming themselves, it can be difficult to know how to help. Many of us are afraid to do or say the wrong thing. Here we will go through tips for supporting someone with suicidal ideation to remove any fears and help you feel more confident in your ability to help a loved one. If the person is at risk of attempting suicide right now or has hurt themselves, call your local police department or 911 right away.
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Understanding Suicidal Ideation
Suicidal ideation is a clinical term referring to thoughts of ending one’s own life. It can range from relatively passing thoughts to a persistent preoccupation with suicide with or without detailed plans for attempting suicide. Some people may have passive suicidal ideation, which is when they contemplate dying or wish to die, without actively working towards that outcome. Passive suicidal ideation is not any less serious and it can quickly turn into active suicidal ideation.
Many factors can contribute to suicidal ideation. Often, they appear when feeling hopeless or out of control in one’s life. These feelings may be due to circumstances such as substance use, physical health issues, relationship problems, loss of a loved one, or financial difficulties. While suicidal ideation is not necessarily a symptom of a mental health disorder, mental health issues such as anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder, and PTSD can contribute.
Some signs and symptoms of suicidal ideation include:
- Feeling hopeless or trapped
- Withdrawing from friends and family
- Talking about death or suicide
- Giving away possessions
- Increased substance use
- Mood swings, anger, rage, and/or irritability
- Accessing means to kill themselves, such as medication, drugs, or a firearm
- Acting as if they are saying goodbye to people
- Sleeping or eating more or less
- Takes dangerous risks
Immediate Actions to Take
If you suspect someone is in crisis or is having thoughts of suicide, you can ask them directly. Asking someone about thoughts or feelings about suicide will not push them towards suicide. Beginning the conversation and giving someone the space to talk about their feelings can reduce the risk of acting on those feelings. Talking to someone from a place of genuine care and concern helps to bring someone who is struggling out of isolation and darkness and back to a place of connectedness to others.
If someone expresses suicidal thoughts to you, it is important to keep calm. Do not get angry at them or brush it off. Simply being there for them and listening can help bring them out of it. However, if they continue wanting to hurt themselves, the number one thing to do immediately is to keep them safe by removing anything the person could use to harm themselves, such as medications, firearms or knives. You should also not leave the person alone. Call 911 or your local emergency number, or if you can do so safely, take them to the nearest emergency hospital. Suicide hotlines are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week and can be reached by calling or texting 988. They can offer further confidential guidance.
How to Offer Emotional Support
When someone expresses difficult thoughts and feelings, it is natural to feel like you do not know what to do or say. Offering emotional support does not need to be complicated, simply being there and listening can be a great help. Here are some ways you can provide emotional support during a crisis:
- Listen. Give the person space to talk and listen to how they are feeling. If they are having difficulty expressing themselves, give them time and let them know you are there when they are ready.
- Stay calm. Even thought it may be upsetting to hear that someone you care about is having suicidal thoughts, try to stay calm. This will help your loved one feel calmer as well and reassure them they can speak about anything without upsetting you.
- Be reassuring. Let them know you care for them, that they are not alone, and that you will judge anything they say.
- Be patient. While you may feel distressed and want to know exactly what they are thinking or get them help immediately, it is important to let them set the pace for seeking support themselves.
- Do not make assumptions. Do not assume you know what may have caused their feelings or what will help them.
Practical Ways to Help
There are many practical ways you can further support someone with suicidal ideation. Some people may be afraid, anxious, or too tired to get the help they need. Some practical ways to support someone includes:
- Researching treatment options with them.
- Offer to make an appointment for them
- Help them organize paperwork such as their insurance information.
- Go to appointments with them.
- Ask them if there are any specific tasks you can help them with, such as feeding or walking a pet, offering a ride, or taking care of a household task.
Professional Help and Resources
Someone who expressed suicidal ideation needs professional help, even if suicide is not a danger right away. You should urge the person to seek treatment as it is not your place to take the place of a mental health professional. There are several options available to help some get treatment when experiencing suicidal ideation including inpatient and outpatient treatment options. 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline is available 24 hours, 7 days a week via phone or text. They can connect you with a skilled, trained counselor in your area as well as a lifeline chat with counselors for emotional support and other services.
Long-Term Support Strategies
Individuals experiencing suicidal ideation can get long-term support through treatment facilities. They are able to access inpatient programs that provide around the clock care and supervision. There are also outpatient programs that allow individuals to get more structured care while continuing to live at home and be able to take care of personal responsibilities. These long-term programs include various types of evidence-based mental health therapies to help people with suicidal ideation and other mental health disorders including anxiety, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and eating disorders.
Self-Care for Supporters
Helping someone who is experiencing suicidal ideation can be tough on the person too. It is important to practice self-care to take care of your well-being and to continue being there for them as well. Make sure you are getting enough sleep, eating regularly, and doing things you enjoy or find relaxing. It is natural to feel guilty about taking time and energy for yourself, but you are also a person with needs of your own. Some people worry they are to blame for someone else feeling suicidal or if the person does not feel better, but it is important to not blame yourself. You should also seek out support for yourself through a friend or family member, peer support groups, or a therapist or counselor.
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How Moment of Clarity Can Help
Moment of Clarity offers comprehensive mental health treatment in Southern California. We provide patients with structured outpatient programs that include individual, group and family therapy options. Suicidal ideation is complex, presenting a spectrum of various thoughts, feelings, and intensities. Clinicians will create a personalized treatment plan for each patient to understand thoughts of suicide and treat any underlying mental health disorders. We strive to create a calm, healing environment through compassion and empathy and ensure no patient feels alone on their journey towards wellness.
If you or someone you know is struggling with suicidal ideation, Moment of Clarity is here for support. Please contact us today at (949)625-0564 to learn more about our services or to schedule an appointment.
